


A Gentlemen's Guide to Gossip and Grinders

by Dedica, rinablanket



Series: The Office AU [1]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Office, Basically and AU of our jobs with victurri pining, F/M, Ficlet Collection, M/M, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-20
Updated: 2018-12-20
Packaged: 2019-09-23 16:15:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17083577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dedica/pseuds/Dedica, https://archiveofourown.org/users/rinablanket/pseuds/rinablanket
Summary: Yuuri starts at a new job and meets so many interesting people… Special snowflakes, if you will.AKA the fic that me and my beta wrote about the shenanigans that happen around our office and to vent our frustrations.





	A Gentlemen's Guide to Gossip and Grinders

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to G Force - a running joke that is our life at work. All of the yoi characters in this fic have been adapted after our coworkers. Here's to hoping none of them ever read this fic!

Yuuri had no idea what to expect the day the temp agency gave him his new assignment. All he had was a campus map and a start time of 7:30 am. The university campus was big and Yuuri did not want to be late on his first day. From looking at the map, it seemed his building was located in the middle of a forest – but that couldn’t be right?

When Yuuri’s bus dropped him off just before 7 am, he pulled out the map and started the long walk across campus. He passed beautiful antique-looking buildings that reminded him of Hogwarts and modern looking buildings that made Yuuri think the architect was drunk when he designed them.

Since it was only a week before Christmas, the campus was practically a ghost town. There was no one around for Yuuri to ask for directions so he hoped he’d be able to find the Campus Services Building on his own. Based on the title, Yuuri assumed if it was a service building it would be highly accessible. It had to be somewhere students and staff easily.

After about fifteen minutes of walking, Yuuri realized this wasn’t the case. This building really was in the middle of nowhere and if Yuuri hadn’t been careful he would have walked right passed it. The Campus Services Building was situated in the middle of what could only be described as a forest. Large pine and oak trees surrounded the building and its small parking lot, making the structure almost look like a cozy cottage nestled in the middle of the woods.

Once he arrived, Yuuri pulled up the email again to make sure he headed to the right room. It simply said that upon arrival he should wait in the lobby. There were two entrances into the building. One opened into a long dingy hallway, while the other seemed to lead to a dark sitting area. Yuuri assumed the latter had to be the lobby, so he went inside and took a seat on one of the outdated couches.

Immediately, Yuuri sunk into the soft cushion and practically fell through the couch. He felt his body jolt in surprise as his knees were forced up to his chin, nearly folding his body in half. Yuuri fumbling out of the awkward position and managed to stand, looking around to see if anyone happen to see his stumble. Thankfully no one seemed to be around just yet. Not wanting to risk looking like a folded taco in case one of his new coworkers walked by, Yuuri opted to stay standing and wait until someone showed up to tell him where to go.

The temp agency had been very vague on what Yuuri would be doing. But with it being this close to the holidays, Yuuri was ready to take on just about anything. Yuuri waited awkwardly in the dark lobby hoping for someone to pass by. The closer it got to 7:30, the more Yuuri worried that he was at the wrong building. Although the front door was unlocked, the rest of the building had almost all the lights off. Yuuri wondered if the unlocked door was a fluke and really the office was already closed for the holiday break.

Finally, at 7:26 a car pulled up into the empty parking lot. Yuuri watched as a man with dark black hair and tan skin hauled five different tote bags out of his car and trudged his way up the path. Yuuri had to bite back a laugh as the man struggled to keep all his bags of various sizes balanced on his shoulders. He had no idea what was in all those bags, but he did his best to school his face as the man opened the door and stared at Yuuri like he was a foreign specimen.

“Are you looking for HR?” The man asked, looking Yuuri up and down.

“I don’t think so?” Yuuri replied, pulling out his phone again to double check his email. “The temp agency sent me. I was told to wait in the lobby of the Campus Services Building?”

The man’s expression instantly brightened as one of his bags slipped from his shoulders. “Oh! You must be JJ’s newbie! Hi, I’m Phichit, its nice you meet you!”

Phichit reached out a hand as yet another bag slipped from his grasp. “I can let you in since it seems no one else is around. To be honest I have no idea why they asked you to start with only a week till Christmas. Everyone around here is either too busy or on vacation to actually train you.”

Yuuri watched as Phichit dug around in one of his many bags, pulled out a set of keys, and unlocked the doors under a sign reading “Administrative Offices”. “I have no idea where you’ll be sitting but you can take a seat over there.” Phichit pointed to a desk practically overflowing with packages.

Yuuri muttered a thanks as the man shot him a cheerful smile and disappeared behind a grey cubical wall.  After hanging up his jacket on the coat rack by his desk, Yuuri took a seat and waited for whoever this JJ person was. Not wanting to be caught on his phone, Yuuri watched the clock as the minutes slowly ticked by.

7:30

7:40

7:50

Just after 8 am, Yuuri stood and wandered over to Phichit’s cubical. The man was practically buried in paperwork as Yuuri softly knocked on the cubical wall. “Sorry to bother you, but I was wondering if you knew what time JJ will be coming in?”

Phichit laughed as he pulled away from his computer and turned to face him. “If he comes in at all, he’ll probably be here sometime close to nine.”

“Nine!” Yuuri hadn’t meant to shout, but the echo of the empty office carried his voice. Embarrassed, Yuuri lowered his voice and took a step closer to Phichit’s desk. He noticed framed pictures of hamsters on his desk, alongside a little stuffed hamster plushy. “Do you like hamsters?”

Phichit squealed as he grabbed for one of the framed pictures and proceeded to talk about his love of hamsters. He talked for twenty minutes, seemingly without taking a breath. Yuuri had no idea one’s love of hamsters could be so great until now. He nodded politely as Phichit told Yuuri all about his three hamsters and the elaborate habitats he had set up in his apartment for them. As Phichit proceeded to show Yuuri pictures of his tunnel system, he saw a few people finally start to arrive at the office. Most smiled politely and waved in Yuuri’s direction but no one dared to interrupt the man who was still adamantly talking about his hamsters.

“Ah, you must be Yuuri!” A woman with long black hair and violet eyes said, disrupting Phichit’s rant. “My name is Sara and I am JJ’s personal assistant.” Sara extended her hand and gripped Yuuri’s tightly. “Have you been waiting long?”

“He was here before me!” Phichit leaned back in his chair, stretching like a cat. “He’s been sitting around with nothing to do for almost an hour.”

Sara gasped, pulling Yuuri a little closer to her. “I’m so sorry! That’s totally my fault! I forgot you were starting today.”

Yuuri tried to force a smile on his face. “That’s okay. It’s nice to meet you, Sara.”

“I’d introduce you to everyone, but as you can see, not many people are in yet.” Both Sara and Phichit laughed as if they had just shared some amazing joke that went right over Yuuri’s head. “JJ is in meetings for most of today so you probably won’t get a chance to meet him. If I’m being totally honest, I have no idea what he wants you to do for him but I’m sure we’ll think of something.”

Sara peered over Yuuri’s shoulder and eyed the desk filled with packages. “Oh I know! You can unpack some of those packages over there. We’ve all been so busy and they keep piling up. I’m pretty sure most of them are just gifts from suppliers. If there’s any food just put it out on the desk for people to nibble at and if there’s alcohol or gift cards, collect them in a box and give them to me when you’re done!”

“Uh, sure.”

“Perfect!” Sara whirled, her long hair almost hitting Yuuri in the face. “Let me know when you’re done and I’ll see about getting you set up in the system! Holler if you need anything.”

Yuuri left the cramped space of the cubical and went to work on opening the boxes. A myriad of colorfully wrapped boxes and gift bags covered the desk. There were too many gifts for Yuuri to remember which item went with each card, so Yuuri thought it best to find a note pad to catalogue the items. Yuuri still had no idea what job he was hired for here, or even who he was working for, but he’d be damned if he didn’t do his best at whatever he was told to do.

To his dismay, all Yuuri could find on the desk was a chewed up stubby pencil and a discoloured pack of post it notes.

Before Yuuri could open the first box, the glass door to the office swung open to reveal two impeccably dressed men, chatting about glitter nail polish. They both seemed adamantly against the very idea of it. Yuuri wondered why on earth it was such a big deal.

The moment they laid eyes on Yuuri, they stopped talking to openly gape at him.

“Well, hello there,” The first man said, eyeing Yuuri like he was a juicy piece of meat. “You must be the newbie. I’m Chris, one of the directors here.”

Chris shook Yuuri’s hand, then pointed to the other man. “And this here is Victor, our acting AVP.”

Yuuri turned his attention to Victor and felt his heart flutter. Victor’s smile was too bright and too pretty for his own good.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Yuuri, and welcome to Facilities.” Victor held out his hand and Yuuri shook it with sweaty palms. Victor seemed to hold on for a few second too long, but Yuuri pretended not to notice. “I can’t wait to work with you.”

“I’ll be working with you?” Yuuri asked, thrilled to finally find out what it was he was supposed to do here. He wouldn’t mind working for Victor. Not one bit.

Victor turned to Chris, who shrugged.

“Actually, I have no idea what you’ll be doing.” Yuuri felt his shoulder sag. “JJ wanted to hire you to help out but I don’t really know what it is he hired you for.”

Chris laughed. “Weren’t you the one who had to approve the position?”

“I approve everything.” Victor brushed the comment off as if approving Yuuri’s paychecks was nothing. “I’m sure we’ll find something for you to do.”

“Well, I guess if you need me let me know.”

“Oh, we will.” Chris winked and linked arms with Victor. “Have a great first day, Yuuri.”


End file.
